The lingering insecurities from my youth—that dreaded feeling of not being good enough or smart enough or talented enough, left me feeling like I always had to prove myself to the world. And no matter how hard I tried, I never felt like I measured up. I now know it was why I spent so many wasted years falling into the pit of comparison.
Whether we do it consciously or unconsciously, we all from time to time fall into this pit. And if we aren't careful, it can generate a notion that if we had more money or a better home or better marriage or a better body, we'd, somehow, be happier or more content.
But comparing oneself to others doesn't bring happiness or contentment. What it does is breed a philosophy that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence—one that can promote an envious, resentful attitude toward others successes. Or, on the flip side, a fixation of pride on our own.
The thing is, the greener grass view only allows us to see what's directly in front of us, which is merely a perception of someone's life. Because how can we possibly know their story from the other side of the fence? And, more often than not, when we do get to know another person's story, either face-to-face or through social media, we realize their challenges are, or somewhat, similar to ours.
Even though I am free from the pit of comparison today, it still beckons me to fall prey to it. For instance, it will often creep into my writing, causing me to doubt my abilities as a writer. But unlike before, I refuse to allow myself to linger in self-doubt; I refuse to fall prey to the lies that I am not good enough or smart enough or talented enough to achieve my goals. Instead, I strive to approach life with a positive attitude. I accept my flaws and embrace the uniqueness of Me. Because if there's anything that age, wisdom, and faith have taught me, it's that life has enough humbling experiences for us all.
How about you? Do you spend too much time comparing your life with others?
As the wise Dr. Seuss once said, “Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.”
Embrace your uniqueness.